Tuesday, December 8, 2009

The Dangers of Separation

Marriage is a togetherness that goes beyond friendship and associations. Marriage is a sacred bond that causes two souls to be joined together as one. That joining can sometimes feel rocky, especially if both parties hadn't decided to sacrifice selfishness for the entity called family.

Often times, couples go through difficult times and contemplate separation. In their minds, living together seems intolerable. They figure a little distance might give them both some perspective. At times, it works, but before you separate from your mate, it's best to consider all sides of the scenario.

The first and most obvious danger is loneliness. We have to remember that most people get married for the companionship of someone they love. When that person leaves, even for a moment, it can create a void. If the marriage is already weakened and the character of the person experiencing the loneliness is not strong enough, they may find their companionship with someone of the opposite sex, which opens doors that no one cares to think about.

The second danger is abandonment. Usually, one person or the other can feel abandoned by their mate when separation occurs. The doubts that will most definitely come build one on top of the other and without proper communication, they will lead to more problems, and often more serious than the original issues of the marriage.

The third danger is the children. Children are always trapped in the middle of any issues involving mom and dad because they love them both, want to be with them both, and never want to have to decide between the two. When they are forced to choose, it puts them in a position they were never supposed to be in.

I don't advocate separation, though there are times when it is unavoidable. But before you leave, know what doors you're opening and what it'll mean to you and your family living apart.

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