Where is He? The Perfect Man

I imagine that most women my age are over the idea of a perfect man. Still, it behooves me to get into that anyway. I've listened to women complain about their husbands for years. He's either not "this" enough, or he's too "that" all the time. It's amazing really if you log our complaints according to importance, most of them wouldn't even rank a one. Yet, those complaints can drive a wedge between the husband and his wife quicker than you can bat your eyelashes.

Who is this perfect man women seek? Is he tall, dark and handsome? Is he intelligent, someone who knows everything about everything? Is he humble? Or, does his confidence fill a room as soon as he enters in? What does this man look like? What does he smell like? What do you imagine he feels like? How does his voice sound? What tune does his heart make in your ear when you lay your head upon his chest? In fact, the biggest question of the night is WHERE is this man?

I don't frankly believe in perfect people. I especially don't believe in the "perfect" man. Maybe that's because I'm not the "perfect" woman. However, I do believe in the perfect man for ME. I believe that whoever you're married to is the perfect man for you. If you erase the familiarity of him being your husband, it brings you right back to when he was your crush. It brings you back to when he was your "Boo" as some say. It brings you right back to when you could focus on nothing but him. It brings you back to when you actually believed he was your knight in shining armor, or whatever it was you most desired back then. Without the familiarity, the man you married is the same one you used to obsess over pleasing. He's the same one whose voice made you melt into a puddle of goo. Yes, that man you married is that same guy who could make you blush just by looking at you too long. Don't you remember? He's "THE ONE!"

Where is this perfect man? Where is he? He sleeps right beside me every night. I'm sure most of you, if you really consider what I just wrote, will feel the same way about your perfect man... He's right there beside you!

Marriage Lessons from Yosemite Sam

Of course the title to this post may seem quite hilarious, but hear me out before you start laughing your head off.

In marriage, many have a tendency to say things that tear down their spouses. Tempers erupt. Words are unleashed like a starving lion upon unsuspecting prey. Unfortunately, once they come out, you can't put them back in. I have a very sharp tongue at times. It seems almost impossible for me to shut my mouth when I'm angry. So, I had to come up with something fast. I didn't want to hurt my husband. But what could I do? I needed some help, and guess who was there for me with my answer? Yep, Yosemite Sam!

Notice how when he's angriest, nothing comprehensible comes out of his mouth. Instead, he shouts off a ton of akwardly arranged syllables. One day in the middle of a heated discussion, I wanted to say something mean, but pulled a Yosemite Sam instead. My husband and I looked at one another and immediately started laughing. We still laugh when I do that. For some reason, it doesn't yet annoy him, and it genuinely helps me say only something good... or unintelligible. LOL! Try it and see if it won't work.

Marriage Demands Sacrifice

Contrary to popular opinion, being married requires sacrifice on behalf of each person involved. Both parties have to be willing to give themselves over to an institution bigger than self. Though there is nothing more wonderful than a happily married couple, there's also nothing that requires more persistence than two people maintaining that happiness.

Marriage is meant to last until death. It's supposed to be permanent. If that's the case, petty issues are not worth damaging a lasting relationship, are they? Why argue about the toilet seat and socks and clothing being left all over the floor? Why argue and say hateful things to one another about who does the most work around the house? It's petty and can cause damage that lasts well beyond the moment it takes to say hurtful things.

To build your marriage, you need to be willing to sacrifice your opinions. You need to sacrifice your pet peeves, even. You need to sacrifice your desires sometimes too. This is marriage. It is a lifetime of sacrifices that pay off with peace, togetherness, love and trust.